Bad Basketball Saturday

I had the pleasure of witnessing a double-header of unwatchable basketball last Saturday. I started the day off with a girls basketball game between 3rd and 4th grade girls. I'm the assistant coach for my daughter's team, so I'm partially to blame for the entertainment value of the team. The saving grace of the team is a pair of identical twins that can absolutely dominate off the dribble.

My daughter tries really hard, but sometimes even good effort can be difficult to watch. For about four straight possessions, I watched her overplay the passing lane and give up the easiest back door baskets you'll ever see. I've got a pretty good idea what we're going to be practicing next week.
The second half of the double-header was the Iowa-Northwestern game. This one was even harder to watch since the first, as Iowa-Northwestern is annually some of the most putrid basketball on the planet. Several minutes of research has led me to the conclusion that the highest rate of suicides in the U.S. are during Iowa-Northwestern basketball games. Iowa managed to play the entire first half without making a 2-point basket. They made 7 3-pointers and a few free throws, while turning the ball over roughly 84 times. Luckily, Northwestern was offensively impotent. They have some dude that weighs 480 pounds and misses shots from 6 inches when he's not busy trying to foul out so he can eat a doughnut. And he was their best post presence until he got sent to the pine for a dozen Krispy Kremes.
The second half was equally gut wrenching. Iowa's shooting cooled down, but they turned the ball over less. Northwestern warmed up a bit, but the Hawks held on to win the game that neither team seemed to want to win. I had several drinks afterward in the hopes of forgetting the horrors I had seen that day.