Pillow fight

This is an actual conversation I had with my wife a couple nights ago. It’s as close as we get to pillow talk. Don’t worry, it’s mostly safe for all audiences.

Wife: I really appreciate that you made the bed…
Me: I smell a ‘but’ coming
Wife: HOWEVER
Me: That’s pretty much the same as a ‘but’
Wife: Anyway, do you see how some of our pillows have zippers? (at this point she uses a prop in case I’m unfamiliar with zippers)
Me: Yes
Wife: When you put the pillowcases on the pillows, can you make sure the zippers are at the bottom of the pillowcase?
Me: Um, why?
Wife: Because if the zippers are toward the open end of the pillowcase, the zippers can cut me.
Me: You’ve suffered lacerations from a pillow zipper?
Wife: Yes
Me: Really
Wife: Yes. The pillow can work its way out of the pillowcase and the zipper digs into my skin.
Me: That’s different than getting cut.
Wife: It’s uncomfortable and I’d like you put the pillowcases on differently.
Me: So you’re admitting you never really suffered lacerated from a pillow.
Wife: Just do it and shut up.
Read more on this article...

Vegas musings-part 2

My brother joined me in Vegas on Friday and we shared the luxury accommodations at the Flamingo. The first night he was there the people in the room next to ours started partying at about 5am. My guess is they had started partying elsewhere and had to move the party back to their room. Needless to say I didn’t get a lot of sleep after that. The next night a guy started pounding on a door near ours between 5 and 6am. He was very persistent, and probably very drunk. He finally gave in after beating the crap out of the door for a half hour. My brother was up an about around 9 that morning and he found him passed out in the hallway right outside our door.

I saw a guy walking through a fountain outside Ceasar’s Palace picking up change that had been thrown in it. I got the feeling he wasn’t supposed to be there, especially since he seemed to be avoiding the pennies. I guess the economic downturn is hitting the panhandlers too. That reminds me, I saw a panhandler holding a sign that said “I’m not going to lie, I need a beer.” I wonder if he does better than the average panhandler because of his amazing wit. If so, I know what my next career move will be.
One of my favorite parts of traveling around Vegas is talking to the cabbies. They always have an opinion and they tend to be great storytellers. I was really disappointed this trip. The driver to my hotel didn’t speak very good English and he was more interested in talking on his cell phone. The guy that took me back to the airport was the laziest cabby I’ve ever met. He didn’t put my luggage in the car and he insisted the bellhop put it in the front seat with him. When we arrived at the airport, I had to get the luggage myself as he made no move to assist. Needless to say, I under-tipped him.
All in all, it was a pretty decent trip. I got to hang out with my brother and John while completely focusing on gambling. When I left I thought I was way down, but I hit a couple sports bets and I’m now about even. It wasn’t my cheapest trip ever to Vegas, but it was close. All told including gambling I spent less than $550 for 4 nights. I didn’t exactly eat like a king (although I did eat at Burger King) but I did get to one of my favorite places to eat, Toby Keith’s Bar and Grill. The pulled pork sandwich is very good and they serve beer in mason jars.
Read more on this article...